I've made a composition...

2009-08-16 02:33 pm

Y'all know my English is not good...bad.
I'm so sorry for asking these questions, but please reply to me.

I've made a composition.
It has lyrics. But it's English.
Are the lyric sentences right with grammar?

Here the lyric goes -

D'ya believe that magic can happen
Or you dream your own fantasy
I believe that your dream comes true soon
That it is the world as you dreamt

Nevertheless we are not together
Or our dreams are much far away
I believe that our dreams come true soon
That it now could be yours and mine

Sometimes we're desperate
Even feeling like dying away
But I think that it's the world as we dreamt

When I draw my imagination
I used to draw an another world
Surrounded with pretty clouds and rainbows
I wanna believe it exists

Walkin' along the narrow road
Which makes me meditate somethin'
Then I think the world is beautiful
That it now could be yours and mine

Sometimes we're desperate
Even feeling like dying away
But I think that it's the world as we dreamt

I know that I love you
Now go into the world
That it's the world as we dreamt

- So, are they right? Want me to attach the nwc file?
Here it goes, click here.

I'm an idiot, so you will have to reply correctly.(Kidding.^^)
I trust you all.

Sesirine.

Re: I've made a composition...

Reply #1 – 2009-08-16 10:10 pm

I tried to click on the link, nothing was there.

Re: I've made a composition...

Reply #2 – 2009-08-16 11:44 pm

Sorry. I didn't write url correctly.
http://tlds.dothome.co.kr/mid/nwc/untitled-42.nwc